As the daylight shortens, my spirit searches for ways to dispel the darkness from within. Music plays an important role in dispersing the dark clouds during the winter months of my life. I love to listen to songs in a loop mode. It creates a specific feel of elation within me. Since there is so much happening in the yearly hitlist, one gathers immense joy from listening to them.
The winters are the hardest season for me. I get very depressed and reclusive. I understand my need to hibernate like the Polar bear. My cave is the space that I hide myself. When you spend time with the self with the bonfire of months passed by that year, it helps me to get a new perspective of my life.
Serious About Writing | Figuring
Let us talk serious stuff. I don’t feel I am alone. It is just that I am not braving it and saying that I want to be a published writer. Let me explain this with a bug example. There is a bug crawling on my worktable. There are a few things on the table and the variable factor is the human me. Suddenly, I fancy crushing the bug until I have seen it crawl on the table for a while. Since I don’t like to harm any creature, I push it down on the floor.
Then I have a full seat view of the expanse of the hall and the small bug has no clue where it should go. That bug is me. Seriously, do I know where I want to start walking in my life? This is my last post for this year. After this, I am going to take a break and reflect on what is the purpose of all this writing about emotions, expressions, and experiences.
Do I really need to maintain this blog space? I always try to avoid taking major decisions in Winter months, since I am usually not upbeat about it. But here is something interesting happening with the bug and me, which I feel like exploring.
A Bug’s Life and Mine
I am the bug whose life is not such a significant one per se. So, someone looking at it from an Ariel view feels that the choice of direction that I take in my life is not right. But in that huge hall of a lonely existence, the bug lives alone unless some crazy human is merciful enough to put its life to an end.
Like the bug, my life would be limited to just this house and a non-entity existence. That is the factor that pushes me to be different and peculiarly unique. I keep making noises in the small space that I live in so that I am someone. What is wrong with just living without any identity? What if my brain memory gets flushed out and there is nothing, not even a name, then what?
The fact that every January starts with new hopes and every December is another year wasted. Or is it like the bug viewer’s point of view? What seems futile is the individual’s journey in life is much more than that which catches the eye?
The bug’s life is short and not so human life. I might be a bug for someone else in this Universe and the choices of direction that I take to explore would be wasted activity. Yet a human or bug’s life is not wasted. All of us have a purpose to function in this experimental space.
The Bottom Line | Seriously!
The whole point of this life is not money, fame or even recognition. It is just for the single soul in the body to find those unique lessons in life. You are given a tool and machine to achieve it and the driver within is the soul which is super talented to teach itself. That is why I believe in experiential learning a lot more than theoretical learning. This year I have written 42 articles of 52 one for each week plan. I am short by ten posts but then the lessons that I learned from the 42 entries are so spectacular that I am surprised and pleasantly happy.
How much of it is relevant? That is the question that kept going around in circles in my head. The fact that I am learning with each passing of the years. This year I have really faced my worst fears. Somehow, I am ready to fight or to go underground out of human sighting. Both options are not a choice at all. I am not surprised that the choices are bleak in winter but then the year ends in the winter, unfortunately.
Positive Take Away from This Year
This year taught me a lot of things.
- Remember dreams are made up of small drops of hardworking sweat
- Dream and keep dreaming, even if the situation gets to be bad
- You are never truly alone in life, your soul is never alone the divine mother guides you
- Call out and all your ancestors will land up on your DNA network | meaning flesh memory
- Keep your dream warm and alive
Hopeful towards 2020! Happy New Year! Thank you for visiting my website.